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Dad
matters!
The greater the intimacy with
their dad, the higher self-esteem and lower depression students aged 14-19 have.
—Living with Teenagers, Jun 2002 (page 15)
Bringing teens back
| September 2002 | Article
Summary | Section: Church &
Society |
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"Youth apostasy and recovery" by Barry
Gane and Steve Case. Ministry, Jun 2002 (Vol 74, No 6). Pages
12-15. Topic: TEENAGERS, REBELLIOUS
Seventh-Day Adventist
Church studies indicate that 28% of today's 12- to 18-year olds don't plan to be
attending church by the time they're 40. What can be done to reverse this trend
of drop-outs?
Teens cite numerous reasons for leaving
church and not looking back: lack of friends at church, the hypocritical adults,
meaningless rituals, church restrictions, and the lack of opportunity they are
given to think for themselves. One researcher who surveyed more than 200 college
students concluded that parental warmth and support encourage children in their
church's religion more and keep them closer to home than do parental religiosity
and religious influence in the home.
When kids begin to stray, they are often
exhibiting a cry for help. Their church, instead of helping, often rejects them.
This rejection, however, should be replaced with more positive, loving
approaches that include prayerful visitation, empathetic listening, and honest
sharing. Eighty-five percent of kids who drop out never receive a visit from a
church member.
Your purpose is to build a relationship, to
win and keep the teen's trust. You want to help build up his self-esteem so he
will feel significant in the sight of his parents and peers. You want to help
build his God-awareness into a recognition that He is loving and forgiving and
constantly with him. God is a friend who dwells with him, a confidante and
guide.
If teens do come back, they will be fearful.
They will be afraid of not being accepted. They may fear that they will have to
change their lifestyle--and they may not be ready for that yet. In order to
prime the congregation for returning teens, congregants should be reminded
periodically about the attitudes and behaviors they need to exhibit to give
teens a welcome home hug they won't forget.
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